How to Have a Breakthrough When Something Is “Holding You Back”?
Do you have something in your life you can’t stand to do? Just thinking about it makes you nauseous but at the same time you know deep inside this is exactly what you should be doing?
Well… that is how I felt about writing a blog. Intellectually I knew, I have to. Each day I had plenty of ideas I wanted to share about things that created positive change in my life…
So what was holding me back? Why couldn’t I write? Silly excuses:
“English is my second language. When I read what I wrote a week ago, I often have no clue what I wanted to say. I may never grasp English punctuation. I saw those delicious recipes in La Cucina Italiana and I had to try them. All. Right now. The weather was perfect. I would rather be biking. Everything has been written.”
But each night I felt deeply disappointed with myself, since I wrote nothing, except a short note in one of my countless Moleskine journals.
If you keep making excuses and ignore your inner voice long enough, bad things happen:
- The creative energy stored inside is expressed in some destructive manner.
- Because you are not utilizing your talents, your self esteem suffers.
- You feel miserable.
- You adopt a belief that others do it better.
- And “if you don’t share your gifts, you steal from those who need you most” – Marie Forleo (interesting perspective, isn’t it?)
In order for things to change, for some of us, the discomfort has to grow larger than excuses. But would the discomfort alone cause us to rebel against them? Would it alone cause a breakthrough?
Right now it seems like I can’t stop writing. So I asked myself: was I able to recognize the moment when the breakthrough was happening? Or did I rather notice that it already happened; that I no longer had the problem.
How does breakthrough happen?
- I came to the conclusion, that for me it wasn’t just one thing.
- It was a series of experiences that changed my perception.
- As a result: I started to value more my own voice.
- I let myself to create and to honor the artist within me.
- I acknowledged the healing aspect of writing and recognized that I learn thru it.
- I am surrounded by creative women who keep themselves to high standards and it is inspiring. Excuses are very unattractive. They are sign that something within us still needs to evolve and mature. “Suddenly” what I resisted before, became a very nourishing activity.
So wait patiently, don’t force it, but be clear about the outcome.
These may be the steps of your breakthrough:
1. Create a clear intention about who you want to be and what you want to do. Know that self doubts are part of entering a new territory, and it will go away, as you progress.
2. Verify that this is an expression of your authentic self; that you are not, in any way, fulfilling others’ plans for you; that this decision will give you inner peace and will energize you.
3. Make the decision. Feel your body and mind saying: This is it.
4. Decide how you will creatively and positively handle people, who will say you are nuts and will be pressing you to get a “real job”or anything that you don’t really want, but is mainstream and “safe”.
5. You will run into other challenges that will test your commitment. Just know this is part of the process.
6. Inspiration: You find yourself in a good company of inspiring people who “just do it”. (but in reality they went thru the same process) Or: you see an unfulfilled need for what you are offering and the need is urgent.
7. Staying open and having faith in yourself you will notice at some point that your beliefs about yourself transformed involuntarily, almost unconsciously and to your deep contentment.
8. Positive events happen because you are clear about your intention.
You will notice that you were the person that was holding you back. And the breakthrough process allowed you to get to know yourself better and grow.
How did you overcome dislike of things that were after all good for you? Tell us about your breakthrough in the comments below. Thank you!