Happy Days and Healing Days.

Notice how on many days you feel fine.
Happy. Clear. Calm.  Like everything finally clicked.

And then… one moment—and it’s gone.

This is part of being human. From time to time a part within wakes up and communicates that it needs healing. 

Healing is not something we complete once and for all. There are stages, layers, and levels of awareness we move through. 

And maybe it’s meant to be this way.

Because on one hand, we get to experience days when we feel: whole, happy, aligned, joyful, in harmony with people, successful, lucky, a peace with ourselves.  These days, build resilience. They remind us what is possible.

And then there are the “healing days.”

The days when negative emotions surface. We fall back. We Slip to the “old self.” At least it may feel this way.

But what if… What if nothing went wrong?
What if this is part of the design?

First: it doesn’t mean we are back at the beginning.  It means something within us is asking to be seen again. We learn to meet our own needs in ways that weren’t possible before.

Second: it happens so we can remind ourselves: this is what pain looks like… and it connects us with others. It teaches us compassion. You felt this pain, now you witness someone else going through it – and now you can really help. 

Those healing days are a reminder of what a human experience is:

This is what it feels like to wake up heavy.
To feel pulled back into something you thought you dealt with, to be surprised: “I thought I worked on this already!” On those difficult days, you could think, “Here we go, I am back to square one…” OR  “A part of me is asking to be healed.”

The inner work is not about reaching a place where we feel good all the time. Emotional Healing, is about knowing how to stop the downward spiral and get ourselves out of it faster than before. It’s about learning how to meet ourselves on the days when we don’t feel good. It’s about building resilience and emotionally resourceful states.

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If you are a healer, therapist, coach… I have a word for you…

…those days might be the hardest for you. You may be thinking, ” I shouldn’t be going through this, I should have it all figured out… How can I help others since I don’t have a perfect life?” You may feel like an imposter. 

To me, it makes perfect sense: Of course, this happens to you. You’re immersed in this work. You don’t just teach it… you live it. You have all the tools, and if this case, they don’t work, you are in a perfect position to develop new tools and processes that can serve others.  Maybe that’s the reason you deal with this challenge in the first place.

You may look into the past to understand the problem.

But its purpose might be in the future.

You may be the one who finds a new way through it.

(Why is sugar my weakness? Because I help women lose weight. That makes me think about a solution all the time. )

In conclusion. We are never done.  Constant happiness doesn’t exist. It’s a wave, up and down. A pendulum swing, back and forth 

All we can really do is to love ourselves through those days, have self-compassion, and return to peace.

And then one day… without forcing it… you feel light again, because you learned how to meet yourself in the imperfect moments