In the middle of feeling “deprived” [weight loss wellness]
Let me walk you thru what’s often going on in my mind. And maybe you can relate a bit. When you feel deprived or restricted.
If you are not trying to lose weight or you are not trying to support your body functions by choosing the right food – this post may be useless to you, or maybe even annoy you. But this is what many people go thru if they want to lose weight.
- I am standing in a line at my favorite coffee shop, observing all the pastries behind the glass… I’m getting coffee, but… I start feeling like I am denying myself something.. Why am I doing it to myself? Why am I so strict? Maybe I can relax a bit? One cookie won’t make a difference.
- A friend brought a cake. It’s fresh and smells amazing. I feel like it would be rude not to eat it. I’d feel like a freak.
- Husband brought home baguettes – they are so goood they may even replace a trip to France. I love my butter with a fresh baguette! (but I give him “a look”; because he sabotages my goal!)
All right, situation assessment:
I feel deprived. Is this true?
Hold on a sec.
The truth is:
I am free to eat whatever the heck I want in whatever quantities I want. But do I want to?
The truth is also that:
Health is very important to me.
Keeping the promise I gave to myself is very important to me.
Keeping the promise I gave to myself helps me feel confident.
The truth is I am free to eat it. And I am free to stick to my goal. The choice is MINE.
I don’t have to go thru sudden memory loss and devour the cake.
Helpful intentional thoughts:
a. I can eat it because I chose to. Not because it was stronger than me. But I need to be honest with myself: I’m eating a cake – I am ok with delaying my goal. And who said I have to finish it? But when I eat it – I make sure I really ENJOY it, not because I want to be nice to someone.
b. I can say NO to it, go thru a little bit (2 minutes?) of “deprivation illusion” not a real thing, since I have other food to eat.
c. Why am I doing it to myself? I am doing it FOR myself. (more in this blog: deprivation paradox)
d. How about other people “sabotaging” my goals? They are free to buy the cake. Their actions are neutral. I am free to choose.
e. The food has no power over me. I have the power.